http://members.lycos.nl/ed00/id20.htm

ALL`S FAT WOMEN SAYINGS"A fat woman sloshed into the shoe store today. Said she was retaining water. I told her not to worry the dam of cellulite should keep us all safe for the next few years!" "A skinny woman with a hooked nose olive-oils into the shoe store and says "I want something to make me look sexy". I say "You'll have to wait a long time before someone that ugly comes in and stands next to you!!"." "A fat woman clip-clops into the shoestore today and says "I want something I can feel comfortable in." so I said "Try Wyoming!"." "Then this woman comes in who doesn't speak English. She points at the shoes, I point at the door. She points at the sky and then knees me in the nay-nays!" "Let me explain. It’s just like an elevator. There’s a 2 ton weight limit on those shoes..." "A customer walks into the shoestore today. A tall willowy brunette. She sits down and asks to try on a pair of size 12 pumps. So I sit down there, doing my business and I notice she's wearing a garter belt whick I like. All the time she'd smiling at me. Suddenly she uncrosses her legs like in Basic Instinct..... It was a guy!!!" "A fat woman walked into the shoe store today. She was so fat, she had three smaller women orbiting around her." "A woman comes into the shoestore today, so huge she's protected by GreenPeace. She asked for a pair of sixe 4 so I asked if she'd eat them here or take them home. Then she has the nerver to complain about my performnce!" "A fat woman godzillas into the shoe store today, she asks for something she could wear to walk in the woods. Jokingly I suggest she wear a sign that says "Don't shoot! From the front I look human!"." “A fat woman came into the shoe store today. Wanted a pair of shoes for a Christmas party. I told her to stand on her hands, put a star in her butt and go as the world’s largest, ugliest tree!” A little kid and his mum are in the store. The kid says "I want a balloon" and Al replies (looking at the fat mother) "You've already got one!". "Then a woman comes into the store, with a crocked nose and asked for something that will make her pretty. I told her that it will take a long time until someone that ugly to come and stand near her" "Women, you can’t live with them …. The end!"